Protocol 17

Currently listening to “Into the Garden” by “John Herberman”
Currently juiced out

He closes his phone’s fold after the reads the SMS. Trying to control inner self, he sits there and start looking outside, wondering…

—

It’s exactly 12pm when he wakes up. Knowing that he needs to do something for that particular special day, he rises and head straight for shower. He grooms himself neatly than normal.

He leaves his house without telling anything his conscious housemates, then head towards the nearest bus stop.

While waiting for a bus to arrive at that stop, he takes out his music player and start listening to ‘Piano Dream’ album from ‘John Herberman’. A collection of nice songs, ripped from his friend’s original CD. He’s not alone at the bus stop, there another Chinese girl sitting next to him, talking on her mobile loudly.

He can always take a cab to his destination but this time, he decided to use a cheaper transport. A bus finally arrives. Paid RM1.30 for the ticket and sits at the nearest empty seat he can find. He bus is quite empty and this makes him feel a bit lonelier. It’s been a long time he didn’t ride a bus since last year.

The bus arrives at its destination, Melaka Sentral at 1.15pm. He quite lucky, as soon as he arrives there, a bus which leads to his final destination is about to leave. Again, paid ticket fee and sit at the nearest empty seat.

Finally, he reaches his final destination – Mahkota Parade.

This is the first time he’s watching a movie alone. Before this, he goes to the movies with his friends, girlfriend and family. Of course, he would like to go with someone, but today, he has no choice and he’s alone. Today could be a sad day for him too.

Checks the schedule and buys the ticket. The movie is called “V for Vendetta”. From the trailer it looks promising and from what his loved one comment, the movie is good. Of course, it’s a sad thing that his loved one already watched this movie with someone else but the choice is not his to make. His loved one also gave out the ultimate spoiler of the movie hence making him feel a bit worried that it’s going to affect his cinematic experience.

The movie starts at 2.30pm and it’s still quite early. To lunch, off he goes to KFC. The price is a bit expensive but for the taste, maybe it’s quite worth it for him since he hasn’t eaten KFC’s chicken for a long time.

While eating, he sees his old schoolmate walk pass in front of him, not alone but with a girl. No reason to get jealous but of course, he feels something’s missing. His old schoolmate didn’t see him.

There’s still time after he finishes his lunch and to kill time, off he go to MPH Bookstore, just like the old days. Of course, MPH Bookstore is no Borders or Kinokuniya, but it’s the only good bookshop there. Before he reaches the bookstore, he reaches Baskin’ Robins first. Looking at the shop reminds him of his loved one. He used to eat ice-cream with her there once. Feeling nostalgic for that reason, he cancelled his plans to go to the bookshop. Gets himself 2 scoops of rainbow sherbet flavoured ice-cream and sit at a corner enjoying by himself. Whether his current action makes him happy or not is still unsure by himself.

It’s near 2.30pm already and it’s time to move. When he reaches the 2nd floor, where the Cineplex is located, there are already a lot of people waiting to get into the cinema. While waiting, he checks out posters of upcoming movies. There’s one Malay movie poster, titled “Gubra”. A really nice poster with a very interesting tagline – “Why do we hurt the most, the ones we love the most?”

The tagline is really interesting that he can apply the tagline to himself. He knows that he need to do something about it and running away is not solving any problems. He stares at the poster for a very long time. Everything keeps on getting back to him. His past miseries and his unstable present.

Today is not the day for that because today is the day for him to enjoy himself. Finally, the wait is over and he can enter the cinema now. His ticket is a really good ticket which places him at the best seat in the theatre. But at that particular time, the best seat is no longer the best seat for him. He’s sandwiched between 2 couples. Feeling a bit lonely and jealous, he tries to ignore them and not to think anything about it.

The movie starts.

The movie ends.

In the end, he found out that the movie he just watches is not suitable for him to watch alone. The movie brings a lot of message related to his life which can solve his problems easily. He did cry while watching. Maybe there’s something wrong about him.

After that, he continues his plans to go to the bookstore. Flipped some magazine, flipped some novels flipped some books and he’s done. It’s time to head home.

Off he goes to the nearest bus stop waiting for bus. Bus arrives, he hops in, pay ticket, get a seat, and he finally reaches Melaka Sentral again. When he arrives there, he sees no bus that will take him to home yet. He needs to wait for a while.

Since he has nothing to do, he focuses himself to the music he’s listening which is still in the same album since this morning. Suddenly someone messages him thru his mobile. That message reminds him of a message that he sent to his loved one yesterday which reads “If u dun mind, tell me when ur free 2moro. Okay? Gnite”.

Till now, she hasn’t reply to that message. He is in deep depression since last month and he started to hide it since a week ago. Meeting her makes him feel a bit calm down and calm down is the only thing that he really needs.

His mobile phone is in his hands and he want to call her badly. He’s also afraid that calling her might agitate her thus worsen his situation. Taking huge risks, he calls.

His loved one answers the call and says that she’s going out for dinner with her new boy. He tries to keep on the conversation going but failed. It seems that he successfully agitated her and worsens his situation. His luck is not going so well since last month.

Quickly he messages his loved one an apology for disturbing her. The reply is not so good – “Hey ko jgn kacau bleh tak? Tak pahan bahase ke? –Khairul”. At first, he does not quite understand with the message with his name spelled wrongly at the end. Soon, he understands that it’s her new boy who messages him. Quickly and panicky, he send another message apologizing again. Maybe something wrong did happen over there, he thinks.

Another message came – “Lepas ni ko jgn kacau. Ko kacau aku straight pegi umah ko”. The message seems very hostile to him, and makes him more worried. His situation really worsens and he got panic. His heart pumps faster and sweats start to appear on his forehead. Of course, he really wants to see this guy for a long time but peacefully not in a hostile mode like this. More worried when he knows that a hostile person is with her loved one.

He sends another peaceful apology message saying that he only wanted to apologize and he means no harm.

He closes his phone’s fold after the reads the SMS. Trying to control inner self, he sits there and start looking outside, wondering…

This time, it’s unanswered. All the way from Melaka Sentral to Bukit Beruang, his face is quite pale and his heart still pumps very fast. He stops in front of Emerald Park.

His day is destroyed. His intention of making it a happy and enjoying day are destroyed. Today, another disaster happens to him. He stares at Emerald Park blocks and think about his next actions.

He needs to go home. Trying to calm himself down and trying to hide his pale face from his housemates, he decides to take a very long path home thru Taman Bukit Beruang.

While walking slowing and his music player still repeatedly playing the same album, he can’t stop thinking about what has happened. He decides to take a longer path, thru Taman Kerjasama.

Walking past a Pasar Malam, he keeps on walking like a mindless zombie. He keeps on thinking and thinking about what happened and what should he do next. Should he wait? Should he leave her alone? Should he stop thinking about it? Or should he not stop thinking about it? The more he thinks about it, the more he realizes the problem is bigger than he taught.

Later, he decided to take a longer path. He wanted to walk along Sungai Putat behind Taman Kerjasama and walk back. Still, something is wrong and he just can’t feel right. He keeps on walking until he founds himself in Batu Berendam. At a point where he should turn back, he didn’t. He keeps on walking and walking and walking, keeps on thinking and thinking and thinking.

He started to feel pain in his chest but it seems like it’s nothing to him. Maybe his miseries are more painful than the pain in his chest.

Walking pass Batu Berendam’s 7 Eleven, KFC, Pizza Hut and SK Bukit Beruang (2), he still can’t calm himself down. The air is not very clean to refresh him but he still keep on walking.

The day is getting darker and his eyes are a bit problematic at night. Finally, he reaches PETRONAS at a road junction. Goes to toilet to drain his waste fluids and goes to shop to buy himself a Livita.

He needs instant energy and he knows that Livita is really good at it. He also knows that Livita actually drains out all of the available energy in your body in one shot, not adding his energy pool. Finishes the bottle in one gulp and continues walking.

He’s been walking non-stop for 2 hours already and the day is getting darker and darker. There’s large Chinese cemetery on his left and it’s dark. It’s no time for him to get scared of ghosts; all he wanted is a solution to his problems.

Pain starts to attack his legs starting from foot. Slowly, he’s loosing control of his body. He keeps on walking and walking. Finally he can see Ibupejabat Polis Kontinjen (IPK) far ahead of him.

He’s been walking for 2 and half hours already and he’s loosing more control of his legs. In his brain, he still keeps on thinking about what happened. It may be 2 normal messages for us but for him, maybe it’s really something important in his life.

Suddenly, he sees a black cat with his problematic eyes. The cat tried to cross the road but unfortunately, a car hits its head. The cat jump around and spins around suddenly towards the side of the road and fall.

Shocked, he quickly run towards the cat and try to see what he can do to save the cat. The cat bleeds heavily and breathes heavily. In the end, the cat stop breathing and it dies. The cat dies right in front of him and there’s nothing he can do about it. Loosing control of his legs, he knees down and cries. He keeps on saying “I’m sorry” non stop and tried to pickup the carcass to bury it somewhere. Unfortunately, everything is very dark at that time, and in his current condition, there’s no way he can dig.

He leaves the scene and continues walking while giving the cat a final look. He continues with his walk with tears on his face. He’s a bit fortunate because the cat didn’t even mew and if it mews even once, the mew will stick in his head forever, traumatizing him forever.

He finally reaches IPK junction and turns right toward MMU. Walking pass US Pizza, he goes into Taman Bukit Beruang Indah looking for shorter routes. He’s loosing control of his legs, his hands which still holds the Livita empty bottle shakes, his visions start to blur and his ears start hearing surroundings faintly.

Finally he arrived at his home in a bad condition. Tired, he tried to walk to his room and try to take a bath.

In his room, the Livita bottle slips down from his hand, and he faints. He hit the floor hard and everything goes black for him.

…

He opens his eyes and he sees the ceiling fan. Founds himself on his futon outside of his room, he tries to move his body. Unfortunately, his body is just too painful to move. His friend is sitting next to him and keeps on telling him to sleep. Grabs a pillow hard, he tries to sleep and to forget about everything that happened.

In his sleeps, he keep on getting nightmares about the cat and the messages.

PS: Too tired to get really specific in later parts. Sorry. Will be completed later. Tpo lazy to include pictures during the walk for now.
PS: De Ja Vu